This was an apartment post over at the best of craigslist. It was such a good read that I thought I would bring it over here to read as a great description of both a residence and a portrait of people who live in the city. The photo above may not be of the apartment itself but its from the intersection where the apartment is located.

Mythic Loft Castle

Four people live here but now that winter is coming, three are moving away. One is homesick, one is done with school, one is dealing with the sudden death of two close friends. All three are leaving the province. This leaves me with a rather large hole to fill, in both quantity and quality, because these are three of the best people you’d hope to meet.

I need three more. Reddit trolls welcome.

About the space
Three stories—
Top story is divided in half; one half is my room, the other is a common room. One entire wall is windows, so both rooms look out over the city and the freight railyard. Giant roof to enjoy before winter fully kicks in. Tall tower to climb, good for whiskeying and sunsetting.

Second story is divided into three bedrooms, centered around a fourth, smaller common room. Walls are made of doors and windows, coated in schematics. One room does not have a door but it does have an indoor balcony, and the bed is built into a door-box made of both doors and functional windows, which looks down into the first floor. Another room has skylights with sliding sail-like curtains and a trapdoor leading to the third-story common room. The last room has an indoor windowledge, a view down to the first floor, a small but perfect workdesk-like area built into the i-beams, and a mysterious portal in the ceiling.

The first story is a kitchen, wood- and metal- working shop, lounge, bike shop, bathroom, loft, and bedroom. The ceilings are very high, tall windows fill up most of one wall. The top of a pagoda hangs about the kitchen counter, strung up with airline cable, and from it dangle pots and pans, dried peppers and christmas lights. There’s an upright piano that needs a little fixing but plays pretty well. The ceilings are so tall that we actually built a small loft in one corner. The powertools, saws, grinders, handtools etc live underneath in a decently-sized workshop. The tools will be mostly leaving with a departing housemate, so if you have your own or want to pitch in, we can set up a second, amazing shop. There’s a six-bike hanging rack to keep your precious bike safe. We built a small fifth bedroom over the bathroom, and at only $100 rent have had some fucking great housemates live there who don’t mind living in a room you can’t stand up in. This knocks the rent down for the rest of us, too. The downstairs will most likely become at least partially a sewing studio, so if you’re into sewing it’s a big, big plus. We used to supplement our rent with shows here until the neighbors complained, but earlier-starting shows could be a real possibility. We’ve had over a hundred people show up for some shows and parties here.

There is no microwave, there will be no microwave here. If you’re into microwaves, move on. We don’t really talk to the landlord, so if you’re someone who’s reliant on people to come fix your shit for you, you’re shit outta luck.

If you hop trains, the hop-out spot is just down the tracks, which the loft is backed right up to. There’s also a wasteland of sorts to explore, if you’re sneaky and careful. If you’re one of those people who do laundry, there’s a laundry machine in the basement, and a great laundromat a block away. The loft is less than a ten-minute walk from the St. Henri metro, less than a ten-minute bike ride to Atwater. Close to the post office and bank and a lot of parks, too. Community garden just across the tracks. Punks and pitbulls in the basement. There isn’t a lot of sound privacy; some of the walls don’t go floor to ceiling. It hasn’t been a problem for us, but if you aren’t into hearing your housemates have sex sometimes, then you might want to consider this before you move in, and what kind of person you are. There are dead animals and birds in the freezer and strung up about the house. Lots of bones, too, and rusting metal. Some of this will go when the housemates go. Pets might be okay, depending on pet.

About me
I’m 24, went to school for liberal arts and hated it so went to metalworking school instead, then came to Montreal for Alexander Technique training. I’m tall, play the accordion, I’m into scams, homebrew, the circus, Tesla, fancy food, tailoring. I was once the star of a dramatic porno. I built a boat this summer and attempted to sail it down the Mississippi, but the police ruined it; long story. I’m into biology and botany, calculus and physics, going to the dump, cooking. I speak Japanese as well as English, and I’m hopefully about to become a tailor.

About you
You are an adventurer. Ideally you are resourceful and independent but still like living in a house that’s pretty communal. Messy and dirty are fine but you gotta do your own fucking dishes. If you’re vegan, well, that’s great, but don’t expect a vegan household. You like dumpstering and don’t mind eating food from the trash. You should like to cook and like spending time with your housemates. Being handy with tools is a plus, making shit is a big, big plus. Of the three people leaving, one was a metalworker, kinetic sculptor, mad scientist; one was a seamstress and painter, and an amazing chef; the last was an electronic musician and illustrator; we’re all dirty as fuck; not expecting you to be any of these things- just to give you a vague idea of a dynamic that worked well here. Violent cuddlers welcome.

I need fucking beasts of people, if you are timid you’d better be a real sweetie or have some goddamned amazing superpowers. This is a house of people who have each others backs and I’d like for it to stay this way, familial and feral. I will take care of you. Sometimes we fight each other for fun, sometimes we all sleep in the same bed. Someone tried to mug me last night and I broke his nose– I’d do the same to someone trying to mug you. I know this is asking a lot but seriously, let’s not add our house to the list of four interesting people who live together and maybe even have some fascinating/admirable/psychotic hobbies and pursuits but don’t amount to much more than that when taken as a whole houses. Think Goonies instead.

If you like some of these things you might be perfect for this house: plants, boats, junk, bikes, board games, stirling engines, cult films, math & science, puppets, drawing, cooking, sewing, knives, comics, history, bones, dumpstering, reading, being outside, making fireworks and booze and fermented foods.

If you are into tiny rooms or are very short, we have a small room for rent for $100. It comes packaged with a free kitchen, free common room, and free housemates.

No pacifists. You don’t need to be crazy to live here, but it helps.

St Remi at Acorn (google map) (yahoo map)